Does Selfless Love Mean Always Being Unhappy

Does Selfless Love Mean Always Being Unhappy?

Question - Our scriptures tell us that we should love God selflessly, with the sole objective of serving Him to please Him. This gives rise to a question that if we should love God selflessly, just to please Him, then what about our own happiness? After all, we deserve to be happy too.

Answer – The Vedas say that God is Happiness -

आनंदो ब्रह्मेति व्यजानात्।
aanando brahmeti vyajaanaat.

Seeing the smoke one can infer there is fire

"Happiness is another name for God". When someone remembers God, they bring “Happiness” into their mind. If that is so, a devotee can never be unhappy. God is divine and his attributes and powers are unlimited in nature, and so Happiness is also divine and unlimited.

Brahma-Supreme God means the one who is infinite and who converts everything into infinite, everlasting and divine.

So, when a devotee's mind gets attached to God with a desire to please Him alone, the devotee naturally become happy. For instance when a mother serves her child to make the child happy, she naturally becomes happy seeing her child happy.

Second, God reciprocates the feelings, emotions and the intensity of love of a devotee.

ये यथा मां प्रपद्यन्ते तांस्तथैव भजाम्यहम् |
मम वर्त्मानुवर्तन्ते मनुष्या: पार्थ सर्वश: || 4.11
ye yatha mam prapadyante, tams tathaiva bhajamy aham
mama vartmanuvartante, manusyah partha sarvasah - Gita 4.11

So, the harder a devotee tries to please Shri Krishna, the more Shri Krishna reciprocates that feeling, making the devotee happier and happier. This competition between Shri Krishna and the devotee continues until eternity.

Unlike, the material moon which waxes and wanes, divine love only waxes and never reaches the full moon state, hence never starts waning

Unlike, the material moon which waxes and wanes, divine love only waxes and never reaches the full moon state, hence never starts waning. Chaitanya Mahaprabhu says:

दोहे करे हुड़ा हुड़ी, बढ़ै मुख नाहिं मुड़ी ॥
dohe kare huda hudee, badha mukh naaheen moodee

"Shri Krishna reciprocates the devotee's love by increasing His own charm which in turn increases the devotee's love. This increasing reciprocation continues throughout eternity and neither of them accept defeat".

We have been practicing to please ourselves since eternity, hence the desire to please ourselves has become second nature. However, upon introspection, we realize that despite trying to please ourselves since eternity, we are as unhappy as ever. Then why not look at changing our methods and try to please the Lord instead. Even if this seems contrary to our belief at this time, take a chance and see the results. Since you are still looking for eternal happiness that you haven’t yet found, you have nothing to loose.

So, do not be under the wrong impression that if a devotee continues to try serving the Lord selflessly with the only intent of pleasing Him, they will never attain bliss. The moment a devotee starts remembering God, he experiences a bliss, compared to which, all other kinds of happiness become insignificant.

निष्काम भक्त कुछ चाहता नहीं, लेकिन मिलेगी सबसे बड़ी चीज़। ये कमाल है॥
nishkaam bhakt kuchh chaahata nahin, lekin milegi sabase badee cheez. ye kamaal ha

A selfless devotee does not desire for anything, except the pleasure of the Lord. Such a devotee gets the greatest bliss. This is the unique glory of God's love.

- Jagadguru Shri Kripalu Ji Maharaj